Have you ever threatened someone?  Come on…there was that one time, or two or three when you were pushed too far.

It happens to the best of us at some point in our stressful lives.  I’m sure you’ve been the recipient of threats at some point too…am I right?  If not…good for you.

When it comes to threats, you need to know what I’m about to tell you sooner than later.

So, keep reading, or I’ll F@#%#@ kick the Sh$% out of you.  See, that’s an example of a threat!  Of course, I was just kidding…I’m not the fighting type.  I’ll get someone else to beat you up…but, I digress.

And, by the way, I get it…I mean I can appreciate how hard it is sometimes dealing with your ex or your spouse when the communication has broken down and you are just “done.”  But, that’s why this is so important.


In this age of technology, with smart phones, email, texting, imsessages, etc, you have to be extra careful what you do.  This may sound like a “duh” statement, but trust me…I can’t tell you how many people do this and then regret it.

Don’t get angry and put it in writing.  Right…duh, but I bet you have done it at least once in the past.  Have you?  Be honest with yourself. Have you thrown an insult or two in a text or email?

Don’t do it.

In a future post, I’m going to get into a lot of detail about domestic violence and how to handle it if you ever get involved in an incident (and I hope you don’t), but for now, I want to stress to you…

Four Ways To Handle Threats

1. Don’t threaten back. Don’t threaten your ex, spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend. Find another way to vent or communicate your frustration. But, if you do threaten them…please don’t put it in writing!  Think before you act.  If you have to go to court for anything…whatever you put in writing toward your spouse will be used against you…I guarantee it.  Why even put yourself in that position?

Just don’t.

There are other ways to deal with your issue other than threatening someone.

2. Don’t react. If you communicate with your spouse by email and/or text, then the best thing you can do is act like you are trying to work with them and solve the issue.

Try to be reasonable (I know that’s not always easy).

But, if you can show a pattern on your part of not agitating, exchanging insults, but rather attempting to be reasonable and resolve whatever the issue is…then, that is evidence you can use to help yourself if you are ever in court seeking relief.

3. Record them. If you can discretely record someone threatening you, that is actual evidence you can use against that person.  However, I say this in all seriousness, don’t ever risk your well-being trying to record someone.  If that person found out they were being recorded, they could lash out even more and put you in serious danger.  You need to use your common sense here, but it’s an option.

4. Keep a log.  This is similar to number 3, but a lot safer for you. Make and keep a log of every time this person threatens you.  Write down the date, time and what the threat was.  This too is evidence and as long as you made near the time the threat happened, it can be useful in a court situation. If the threat was a voice mail, don’t delete it…same for text threats and emails.  Print them out if possible and keep them somewhere safe in case you ever need them.

So, there you go, four ways to handle threats if you find yourself on the receiving end of any.

Of course, if anyone physically threatens you and you feel your safety is at risk, call the police right away.  Better to be careful than be hurt, or worse.

Till next time,

Be strong, act confident and stay positive!



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